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CNNNews
Newbie
Posts: 1
Registered: 05-16-2007 Location:
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posted on 05-16-2007 at 10:21 |
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Asian Mail Order Brdies
HONG KONG, China (CNN) -- Online, thousands of mail-order bride sites are putting a bevy of Filipina dream girls just a mouse click away.
Internet proliferation is causing a surge in international dating services, and for more than 150,000 Filipina women it's also offering hope for a brighter future as a foreigner's bride.
A foreign future
Josie Valdez is one of hundreds of girls posted on the web. The 23 year-old Filipina domestic helper is looking for a potential partner and a better life abroad. Valdez, who has a child, says she has expectations of her future spouse.
"He must love me," she says. "They must accept me and at the same time my son too and where I come from. My values. My traditions."
For the men interested in ordering women like Valdez, online sites allow them to sift through thousands of pictures of potential brides. They then get in touch by paying for the address of the girls they like. A successful match often means a move abroad, but it's not as innocent as it seems.
A dangerous decision
In fact, following a potential spouse can be dangerous. Critics say online brides are often forced into domestic work.
"Mail order bride is like mail order slavery," says Cynthia Tellex, director of the Mission for Filipino Workers in Hong Kong. "It's modern day slavery. Many of them end up being battered."
Tellex also says the girls are often frustrated by clashing cultures.
"Many of them thought that like in the Philippines the man would surrender whatever earnings he has to the wife," she says. "It's not so in many countries. It's not the practice."
But many mail order brides suffer situations much worse with some even ending up dead. In 1995, Filipina Susana Remerata was murdered in Seattle by her husband Timothy Blackwell. She'd been pursuing a divorce after alleging abuse.
Recently in September last year, Anastasia King from Kyrgyzstan was also found dead in the U.S. Her husband has been arrested on first-degree murder charges.
Filipina leaders are aware of the dangers. Nearly ten years ago, then president Corazon Aquino banned agencies soliciting girls for marriage to foreigners. Violaters can face up to eight years in prison, but enforcement has proven difficult. The dating services often just set up shop outside the country.
Ever the romantic
Despite the horrific tales, women like Valdez still have hopes of finding a romantic future over the web. And although Valdez says she was scared the first time she signed up, she plans on keeping her photo online.
"One of my pen pals asked me what is my plan, then I told him if you're going to get me to the U.S. then that's fine," Valdez says.
The optimism held by mail order brides is understandable. Tellez says the women take a risk to escape poverty and are willing to try their luck even with the potential dangers.
"Whatever happened to Maria might not happen to Nana. That's how they think. 'I might be luckier than her,'" Tellez says.
For Valdez, that's exactly the kind of online luck she's counting on to bring her and her son a promise of better things to come.
"I always plan that after a few years in Hong Kong then I'm going to Canada as a stepping stone, and who knows, I'm going to the U.S. also," she says. "If others succeed, then maybe I can succeed. If it's a failure, than that's my fate."
Related sites:
loveme.com
foreignwomen.com
foreignladies.com
asiansingles.com
asianheart.com
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AlexAppleton
Newbie
Posts: 4
Registered: 12-15-2008 Location:
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posted on 01-26-2009 at 03:44 |
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Russian Brides
very good information about Asian mail order brides.....
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adrien53
Newbie
Posts: 3
Registered: 06-19-2009 Location:
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posted on 06-19-2009 at 03:01 |
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Mail Order Slavery
I am very sceptical about mail order brides. These women from Russia or Asia just want to get out of their home country and live a better life somewhere else. This has nothing to do with love or sympathy, they just want to go the Central Europe or the US as fast as possible. They divorce later when they have papers and the permission to stay in the country. You should be careful with the online dating business[/url] since your feelings may get hurt. Find a woman in a normal way and don't order a poor girl from overseas.
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aisians_are_cool
Newbie
Posts: 1
Registered: 01-12-2010 Location:
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posted on 01-12-2010 at 10:22 |
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I Disagree
Bad things happen to men and women all over the world. These cases are in the minority. Many happy life-long relationships have been formed via the internet. In fact I know of several happy couples who have met online, domestic and forign. The problem is that when something bad happens it gets plastered all over the news. This gives the false impression that this is all that happens when in fact these cases are in the vast minority. Online dating today is safe and fun and native Asian women, like all women, want love and companionship and often find that Western men fit the bill.
After all, if all the cases ended in tragedy, nobody would pursue online dating at all.
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new_slang
Member
Posts: 26
Registered: 01-04-2010 Location:
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posted on 01-12-2010 at 11:42 |
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Agreed
I agree with you AsiansAreCool, it is unfortunate that people in general are so quick to judge something as either black or white. Yes, obviously there are women from these countries that have alterior motives just based around getting into the country, but how can you disregard an entire dating option because of that? Just because sometimes scams occur because the man isn't being as safe as he could be and the person can easily take advantage does not mean that happens all the time. It doesn't really seem to happen much at all compared to the amount of people who have been happily brought together by international dating. I guess the key is looking after yourself and being 100% sure about the person before committing yourself. Go through a respectable agency and they will do everything for you except the talking. It isn't fair to say that these intelligent and attractive women don't have the right to date American guys, and it's the same the other way around.
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ammyrodrics
Newbie
Posts: 1
Registered: 01-21-2012 Location: New Delhi
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posted on 01-21-2012 at 02:40 |
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Completely Agree
Yeah even i agree..It is unfortunate that people in general are so quick to judge something as either black or white.
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shivangigupta
Newbie
Posts: 1
Registered: 10-19-2013 Location:
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posted on 10-19-2013 at 02:38 |
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To the bridal sarees
It is an awesome services from your side. I really appreciated it. Thank for giving this plateform to get married .
kalkifashion
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kavya
Newbie
Posts: 0
Registered: 04-10-2017 Location: India
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posted on 04-10-2017 at 05:11 |
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It all depends
Its all depends on person to person. Hope it got the power to know a person. I guess, Al human become mean some times.
Womansvilla
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dennehy78th
Junior Member
Posts: 12
Registered: 07-20-2020 Location: Newark NJ
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posted on 09-15-2020 at 08:42 |
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Asian mail order brides today
No doubt about the increasing problems of human trafficking and the sex slave industry. It is real and not to be taken in an offhand way. But having said that, this CNN topic mixes those apples with non-related oranges.
First of all, there is no such thing as Asian Mail Order Brides. They wouldn't fit in the postage box:-) But seriously, mail order brides existed during past centuries but not today. Today, in a much different modern world, we have vetted companies whose services include introductions to foreign women living in foreign countries, correspondance with asian women or other foreign women, gift services to send flowers or candies to women in the Ukraine, Russia, or wherever. We can investigate those companies via sources like the BBB and websites with real reviews from clients or customers. Its just not the same, in any way, as mail order brides. That old notion has been over with for 100 years.
Is the world a dangerous place? Of course it is, but modern businesses dealing in the services that unite couples through legitimate means are there to remove potential threats, not create them.
Choose an older company, one that has been around for a couple decades. Visit their sites and start investigating reviews, products, BBB ratings. Contact the company, especially if it is USA based. They should have satellite offices in the foreign cities where they also operate. Be smart. And don't listen to fear-mongering reports from news outlets whose reporters spend a few days writing to connect apples and oranges.
The world is dangerous, but so is dumbed-down reporting that passes itself off as expert.
Use your brain. Ask questions. Take a deep breath and relax.
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